In the last year I’ve learned that I have to work really, really hard to keep my body together. I’ve also learned that I find joy through food, especially when the pleasures of friends and family and travel are absent.
In October I began physical therapy (full body strength training) three times a week in person, with three days of home exercises. I set my November goal to do 6 days of PT a week, barring migraines. I set my site on a new handbag as reward. It worked. It was an achievable goal. I have a lovely new bag that I take to the grocery store and pharmacy and physical therapy. They are the only places I go. My goal for December and January was to make it through the holidays with my sanity in tact. I made it, mostly, while still keeping up with PT at home and with my physical therapist.
Now it’s a new month, and it’s time for new challenges. This month, I aim to keep up with PT six days a week, plus two days of cardio (heart health, endorphins, blah blah blah) and keep my daily food within range of calories that will fuel my workouts and help me lose some weight. At the end of this month, my reward will be a piece of cheesecake – with chocolate and caramel, or maybe peanut butter. I’m not sure. I can work that out later.
But. Oh, the but. Tonight I got on the stationary bike because I have a low level migraine and the bike lets me get my heart rate up while sitting down and is less likely to make my head explode. And somehow, I don’t know how because I was SITTING DOWN, I’ve pulled a muscle in between my ribs. I regret everything.
Then I saw this meme and honestly, maybe chubby is fine.
Alphabetic Fate 
I don’t think you’re chubby at all. You are lovely. But you do healthy things for you, and if the byproduct is that you lose weight, that’s fantastic. Take care of yourself, mind and body. super important stuff!
when we moved to DC, I weighed 240. yesterday at the doctor (getting ready for some surgery, fun!) I weighed 204 according to the scale there (my scale says 210 so I’m believing their scale). I set out at the beginning of 2020 to lose some weight. I didn’t put a number on it, just lose some weight. In February of 2020 I went to the doctor and was at 220 so I said okay – I can put a number on this. I’m aiming to break 200. If I get to 199, that’s cool.
Then… the pandemic hit, and my walks to and from the metro stopped, and it is hella hot in DC so I hate going for walks from May to November (so hot). So I kind of stopped my main activities. I didn’t replace anything at home. I was a lumpy slug. But I didn’t gain a pound. stayed at 218 pretty much.
Then, I got Covid for Christmas (thanks Santa!) and ended up breaking that 199. got down to about 195 because i couldn’t eat anything other than saltine crackers and apples with peanut butter.
Back up over 200 isn’t bad. I am promising myself that once it is warmer i’ll go out and walk, and then also stop whinging about the heat and go out and walk more. and break it again.